Why Can't Certain Weapons Random Crit? [TF2]

the question no one was asking but now you wanna know the answer to.
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songs used:
f phunk - Vince Kaichan
+TEK - Home World Run OST - Waterworks Theme
Bacter & Saga Musix - Neon Racer
+TEK - Insert Coin for Beatdown (Yuuri's Theme) [2019]
Mighty Switch Force 2 - Dalmatian Station